My presentation group

thought that we would present today but it was one of those classic saved-by-the bell moments, we didn't have to go. I felt like I was in primary school again. I was terrified about getting up in front of class to give my presentation. This strikes me as odd for several reasons since I feel the most comfortable stepping into a classroom full of middle school students 15 minutes before I am going to implement a lesson plan as a substitute for the day. There I feel alive, creative, social, and playful. I don't get this nervous even on days when I have created the curriculum.
Tonight's anxiety had something to do with the fact that I am trying to speak about something that I have not yet developed a strong conviction for, and hadn't put enough thought into. but I am going to turn the tides on this one a little bit now that I have the time. I will remake my slides and presentation. I will find in this week break, the energy that I know I exhibit under certain conditions. I will create those conditions. Sometimes it will be uncomfortable, sometimes it could even head me towards tricky situations, but I must be honest with myself. Education is teaching through showing, creating the environment for revelation together.

The Student interview

was a great part of this course so far. It was striking! Since I on;y teach middle school, I was picturing middle school-mentality, but these students were incredibly mature and sharp. There was a wide variety of questions, but I only asked one. My further observations are in no way judging their competence, as I have no recent experience with high school students (except for my cousin from Monte Sereno who is in the private school system) so I have no grounds to anyway.
My question for them was as follows

We are obviously in a trend where the Arts/electives are being cut for funding reasons. This question is for you too look at your school as a whole and tell me what you think the average student thinks about this trend. Would they not care on the grounds that these electives have little value in preparing them for the real world, or would they be upset in seeeing that we are screwing ourselves over by losing these?

Ramon started off answering in his own feelings. so the perspective of my question was maybe not conveyed clearly enough. But he seemed to see value in the arts, as he was in a photography class(film, not digital) and he had been awarded a prize from a Los Gatos Foundation of sorts for a studio shot of his.
The four of them(Kimo incl.) were sensitive to the fact that electives were for the students that are perfect and high achieving in their other academic classes. This might seem obvious since it is basically how all schools function, but in Ramon's case the rare chance to take photography probably offers him respite from his academic classes that he is likely struggling with for various reasons. It is a chance to use his mind in a freer and more creative way. Bluntly, the kids who need it most are put as far away from it as possible. Could we devise a system that integrated the academics into electives, so that they can earn merit while making something with our hands?
I need to be bold. I was not bold tonight. I didn't ask another question. I did not put myself on the line, and did not allow them to push their own boundaries of what is right to talk about and why. Maybe they can come back for a second interview? Maybe, one day these three students will attend a credential program. National? Could they afford it? Can any teacher/candidate afford it when districts are shedding teachers by the hundreds?